January 2009
“I had a dream that I beat the shit out of Brad Pitt. I don’t have anything...”
– Coworker Luke, via phone
Getting to know our President →
askvero:
rhodyram:
White House Unbuttons Formal Dress Code - NYTimes.com
“Although his presidency is barely a week old, some of Mr. Obama’s work habits are already becoming clear. He shows up at the Oval Office shortly before 9 in the morning, roughly two hours later than his early-to-bed, early-to-rise predecessor. Mr. Obama likes to have his workout — weights and cardio — first thing in the...
AH MERDE, zey ave ze french keyboaaarrds en...
extrafirmhold:
I cqnnot type qnything becquse qll the fucking keys qre in different plqces. ZISS IS AN OUTRQGGGEE. CQLL JACQUE COUSTEUQ. BAGUETTE. BOEUUUUFFFFFFFF. CAFFEEEEEEEEEEEE. LA FENETREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
his posts make me laugh every time i reread them.
“The worst thing a guy can do is make a girl fall for him with no intentions of...”
– (via littlemiss) (via kari-shma)
Obama reverses abortion-funds policy →
askvero:
commacommachameleon:blogonthe:
President Barack Obama on Friday quietly ended the Bush administration’s ban on giving federal money to international groups that perform abortions or provide information on the option.
obama, i have such a huge crush on you right now.
“Peculiar travel suggestions are dancing lessons from God.”
– Kurt Vonnegut
bringtheruckuss's 5 more tips to get the girl
askvero:
mzchristine:
jgh:
bringtheruckuss:
1: learn to eat out…and i’m not talking about applebees
2: keep your short and curlies trimmed
3: do romantic stuff asshole, surprise picnics and shit.
4: never talk shit about her fucked up family. she can, but you can’t.
5: if she’s excited about something, guess the fuck what? your ass better be too!
bonus tip: employment.
...
“Turns out not where but who you’re with that really matters.”
– Dave Matthews (via kari-shma)
I named my kid "Voicemail" and all I got was this... →
rocketboom:
reporter.co.za: Ever since mobile phone services were introduced in KwaZulu-Natal some parents have named their children after some of the terms used by mobile services providers.
According to Home Affairs statistics some of the children born from 1993 when mobile services were introduced in the province (and the rest of South Africa) have the following names:
1. Network Madondo 2....
tabii says (12: 07 AM):
i have a cat!
tabii says (12: 07 AM):
we watch tv together!
Jimmothy says (12: 07 AM):
You and the cat?
tabii says (12: 07 AM):
yes!
Jimmothy says (12: 07 AM):
Wow it's almost like having a real boyfriend.
“I would’ve given anything and everything for you. I was willing to tough out the...”
– (via littlemiss) (via kari-shma)
science RULES!
automaticka: OH MY GOD
automaticka: SOME DUCKS HAVE 14 INCH PENISES
automaticka: also, THEY RAPE THE FEMALE DUCKS
hi dandelion: ........................
automaticka: DUCKS ARE ASSHOLES
